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The F Word – How To Overcome Fear Of Failure

When I started coaching musicians I wasn’t surprised to find that
fear of failure came up almost more than anything else.

This generalised, vaguely defined fear causes procrastination, perfectionism and “not being in the mood”. And at it’s worst this fear of failure can lead to creative block or burnout. I’m sure it even stops many from taking their first step.

So I declared war on fear and discovering how to overcome fear of failure moved to the top of my list of priorities. And after many different approaches, I found that the simplest solution was the most effective.

Most people don’t realise how much the language they use affects how they think, feel and behave. But even though language is the medium you use to describe and interact with the world around you, it isn’t a one way street. Not only does your language describe your experience, it creates it.

Yes, you use words to describe your experiences to others, but you also use words to describe your experiences to yourself. And by using words like failure, what do you expect you are doing? That’s right, setting yourself up for it.

In fact I believe that the word failure is probably singlehandedly responsible for more dashed hopes and dreams than any other in the English language. So I want you to try something. Banish the word failure from your vocabulary. And replace it with another F word:

FEEDBACK.

By thinking about the results of your efforts as feedback, not success or failure,
every result is a win, even if those results are different from your expectations.

What’s more, disappointing results will give you feedback that is more useful. I mean, aren’t you sick of well meaning friends and family telling you that your stuff is “great” or “nice”? Where does that get you? Nowhere fast…

So remove failure from your vocabulary immediately and replace it with feedback.

You’ll work quicker, finish more and enjoy it because you’ll get addicted to the feedback. I know I did.

And more than learning how to overcome fear of failure, you’ll become fearless when you experience how much quicker you improve with disappointing feedback.

So finish it, put it out, seek out that feedback. What are you scared of?

Filed Under: Featured Post Tagged With: how to overcome fear of failure, overcoming the fear of failure

How can I help you?

Claude VonStroke (Dirty Bird, USA)

Mike Monday’s process has helped me enormously. I have two record labels, a heavy touring schedule, a wife and two children, and a music production career all running in tandem. There are times when it seems unmanageable and i get lost in a downward spiral that limits my effectiveness as a leader and my ability to be creative in the studio.

Whenever i have a session with Mike we talk it all out and a sense of calm comes over me. i get back to basics and work out all the things in my head that need to get worked out. His process is both calming and therapeutic.

I would also like to add that the additional fact that Mike is a music producer himself and a veteran DJ lends itself to an extra level of trust. I don’t think i would take advice or listen to someone in the same way who was from outside the music industry. In an nutshell I find Mike Monday’s process to be an extremely valuable way to organize and free my chaotic brain to do what it is supposed to be doing.

Johnson Peterson (Yolanda Be Cool)

“I found the time with Mike to be extremely beneficial. His process opened me up to ideas that, even where obvious, I had overlooked or forgotten and I am looking forward to taking them with me to the studio. It was definitely worth it.”

Janelle Palmer (Tutukaka Coast, New Zealand)

“What your course has done for me has been remarkable and I really feel so grateful to you…

Radical is a good word for it! The most unexpected thing I’ve found about the course is the impact it has had on other areas of my life – I was quite surprised about that…

These are definitely transferable skills we are learning here!”

– Janelle Palmer (Tutukaka Coast, New Zealand)

Brett Adams (Los Angeles, California)

“I already think this is one of the greatest decisions I’ve made, and we haven’t even started the curriculum yet.”

Vernon McCarthy (Wellington, New Zealand)

“I just felt inspired to send you a really quick message to say hello and let you know that I am going great guns at the moment.

Managing to get a average of two hours every day producing. This is a huge turn around for me and am loving it. It hasn’t been easy though but I have kept at it.

And much of it has been due to the help and inspiration from yourself, the group and me now actually putting in the work. The online community is such a good thing. Everytime I have gone to have a look I have found something relevant to my thoughts and that has helped me.”

Joe Roberts (London, UK)

“Mike has helped me to start living the truism that it’s not what you use to make music, it’s your ideas.

Those ideas only mean anything when you start putting them down though and that’s what this course has already helped me to start do regularly.

I’ve made more headway in two weeks than I’d managed in a couple of years on my own starting projects, then giving up and starting something new but never seeing them through till completion.”

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